The wind was blowing softly, whispering to me it’s going to rain soon. I didn’t care. I knew he would come. He’s not the type that wouldn’t.

I was leaning on the fence of the park lake. I hope it was rusted and the fence will break off and I’d fall into the lake, drown and never to face this phase of my life. But I had to, I knew I had to. One day. But I took the chance anyway. Big mistake.

I see he come towards me, big smile on his face, as usual. It reminds me of the time it was his birthday party, I was there beside him, and yet it was as if I wasn’t. all the guys wanted to talk to him, shake his hand, congratulate him. All the girls wants to wish him happy birthday, give him a flirty smile and hope he’ll remember it in his sleep. I’m his girlfriend, and yet they would do that, even in front of me, but who was I?

“Hi,” he said to me, waking me up to reality. “What did you want to talk about?”

“Umm…” I started, but he stopped me.

“Wait, I forgot,” he smiled and showed his perfect white pearls, and gave me a gentle peck, lingering for a second. “So, what’s up?”

I blushed but got over it. “I… think it’s not working out so well.”

His face whitens. It was fall but warm, warmer than usual. So I could tell it wasn’t the breeze. “What do you… mean?”

“I looked away. I can’t stand it. After all he’s done for me. After all the smiles that I don’t deserve. I’m breaking up with him, because I’M the imperfect one?

No. I’m breaking up with him because he’s too perfect.

“I’m sorry, Greg,” I said. “I… just can’t… I don’t feel happy when… you know… we’re together.”

His eyes start to sadden and I could tell he felt like screaming, but he wouldn’t. He just kept it in there, because he’s perfect like that. He wouldn’t shout at someone for being wrong, because he doesn’t want to hurt their feelings. “What do you mean?” he asks again, not sure of what’s happening.

I sigh. “I’m sorry Greg. I’m not good enough for you, and I could tell, and I could feel the awkwardness, and I feel bad for not being there for you like you do me, and I feel bad for not being able to help you in Algebra, like you do me, and you don’t understand the feeling of competitiveness when there’s other prettier girls out there waiting for you, more perfect girls, better girls, and it feels even worse… knowing that you could leave me anytime… for that very girl.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” he said immediately, reassuring me.

“I know you wouldn’t,” I said, sighing. “You’re not like that. But things happen.”

“Lydia, I’M the one that says if you’re perfect or good enough for me. And you don’t have to be perfect, you just have to be you. It doesn’t matter. I love you the way you are, and I’ll never let you go.” Right then, he hugs me tightly, securely. I didn’t pull back. It felt honest and true. He’s there to hold me back up if I fall off this fence. He’ll be there whenever I need him. But problem is, will I be there for him?

He gave me a quick squeeze and pulls my chin up to his face and starts to kiss me with full of passion and security, the way he always does. It felt like he’ll never let go, he’ll never let me leave him, without his permission, and I will never have to leave.

He stopped and took a deep breath, his arms still around, securing me tight. I wanted to walk away but that would be selfish. I thought back what I was doing.

I’m breaking up with him because I couldn’t stand the fact that I would always owe him if I stay with him. But I know he’s not the kind of guy that really cares. He just loves, he never cares. Should I stay, or should I go?

Then he pulled my chin to his face again.

“Don’t go.”

I started to shed tears. I closed my eyes, just letting them all go, and wish that when I open my eyes, Greg would disappear.

“Look at me.”

I open my eyes and he’s still there. Tears are running down my cheeks, and I could feel my nose water too.

“Never, ever leave me because I’ll never leave you.”

I sighed. “I…”

“Promise me.”

I looked him straight in the eye.

“I promise never to leave you.”

“Me too.”

And he hugged me again, this time pulling me towards him. I never let go. He’s too perfect, and I’m not good enough for him. Looks like I have to live with it because I love him too much.